I went to an antique store today. These words are utterly inadequate to describe the experience. I will tell it mostly through pictures. Be warned - the full size photos are huge, unaltered from where I downloaded them from my phone. There is so much detail to see, I didn't dare shrink them.
The name of the store is Joe Ley's. I've lived in Louisville most of my life, and I had no idea it was here. Then again, viewed from the outside, I had no idea what I would get.
And the view of the other half of the front yard.
And the view of the closed off courtyard.
So, cool lawn sculptures. Fair enough. We go inside, and I am treated to this - which is more or less what I was expecting. Absolutely crammed with pretty old furnishings. The clown head is cute.
Here is the back wall. Pretty old fashioned furniture. Only the torch sconce was a hint of what I was getting into.
You see, that was just the first room. That was the cashier's room, in fact. There were more. I take a little back door into the main hallway. Note the reflection in the mirror of the giant Egyptian sarcophagus.
I turn right into another packed room. By now, I'm a little impressed. They've crammed a whole lot of antiques into this little building. Yes, that is a mannequin of a security guard, and he is for sale.
I liked these little lanterns.
No antique store is complete without a man-sized column of cherub statues and a fake parrot.
I had to skip over the more-than-life-size Jesus statue, because the glare from the windows made it invisible. Instead, have some of the classy ceramics and old paintings I expected in an antique store.
More statuary, including a large bird. Also, Portrait Of The Artist Who Didn't Realize His Open Coat Would Make Him Look Like A Hippopotamus. Those little tags are part of a complicated pricing system I never understood.
The Hall Of Merry-Go-Round Horses. Like a fool, I almost did not go down this hall.
Instead, I stopped to look at this really pretty clock face.
And a photo of the whole clock. $2000, but man, is it pretty.
Here I made a fateful decision. I would go down to look at the warehouse after all. The warehouse was why I came, technically, as a driver for someone who needed to pick out out-of-date tiles. See, this is the store's actual business - they have big piles of antique building supplies, so that people owning old homes can buy replacement spindles for their staircase bannisters. Stuff like that.
Stopped by the warehouse door to photograph these old advertisements, which were the most interesting thing I'd seen in the store so far.
And then I stepped into the warehouse.
I didn't know where to start. Have some tools.
I'm going to call this 'Lucy Row'. My friends will get it.
Oh my god, old fashioned typewriters. Portable, even! I am ancient and crusted with filth and remember the typewriter days!
No, I don't know.
The back wall.
Ha ha ha! Oh, wait. Did I say that was the back wall? There's also this big section, where the tiles and other replacement house parts are kept.
And behind that an even bigger section. Now I knew the truth. The antique shop is a sham cover for this gigantic underground bunker.
Oh, and there's MORE house parts underneath that!
And a door into an even larger room that contained doors. Hundreds and hundreds of antique doors.
Having recorded the sheer size of the warehouse, I felt free to hunt down the coolest things I could find and photograph them. A box of stamps!
Ah, I wish this picture wasn't so blurry. Antique coca cola bottles - unopened. That black stuff? Actual coca cola. I sloshed it around. These aren't display pieces, they're regular coke bottles.
I found the scythes. Scythes, plural. Sondra would have had hysterics. My heart skipped a beat. RUSTY, ANTIQUE scythes, even!
I could not photograph the locked room full of toys. In fact, as I sort through these photos, I am now freaking furious. Several of my photos have gone missing! Where is the photo of the toy cabinet with the metal toy soldiers and the Bugs Bunny and Woody Woodpecker books?
Fine. I will leave you with the This Is Messed Up room.
(There is apparently an upstairs. I did not find out until after I left. Cripes, to think there was even more cool old crazy stuff I missed the first time!)